How Could You Be So Cruel?

How could you be so cruel?
Some people are just out right mean and nasty.
They think they don’t owe anyone anything and that they are the shit.
You’ll hardly see them smile or say a nice word about anyone.
All they do is complain about people they don’t like.
The worst part is their righteous attitude.
Like they are just so much better than you at everything.
They’re, hotter, more badass, have hotter friends, party more.
Like, what does that do for them? I don’t understand how that can be a satisfying way of life.
The whole ‘fuck everything’ attitude.
Actually makes me sad that they don’t care about anything. All they care about is being better than you and putting you down, making you miserable.
Don’t let them do that to you, don’t let them take your smile and don’t let them take your beauty.
I have been known to be one of these girls, but once I actually started to realize I was becoming a monster, someone I wasn’t proud of, I still had people by my side.
Those are my true friends.
Not scowling, immature, nasty girls. I can grow and change, but they’ll always be that way.
You can’t photoshop an ugly heart.

You Dare Tell Me You Love Me

Sparkling grey,
They're my own veins.
Any more than a whisper,
Any sudden movement of my heart.
And I know, I know I'll have to watch them pass away

Just get through this day

Give up your way, you could be anything,
Give up my way, and lose myself, not today
That's too much guilt to pay

Sickened in the sun
You dare tell me you love me
But you held me down and screamed you wanted me to die
Honey you know, you know I'd never hurt you that way

You're just so pretty in your pain

Give up my way, and I could be anything
I'll make my own way
Without your senseless hate... hate... hate... hate.

So run, run, run
And hate me, if it feels good.
I can't hear your screams anymore

You lied to me
But I'm older now
And I'm not buying baby

Demanding my response
Don't bother breaking the door down
I found my way out

And you'll never hurt me again.

In My Time Of Need

"I can't see the meaning of this life I'm leading, I try to forget you as you forgot me
This time there is nothing left for you to take, this is goodbye
Summe is miles and miles away, and no one would ask me to stay

And I, should contemplate this change to ease the pain.
And I, should step out of the rain, turn away.

Close to ending it all I am drifting through the stages of the rapture born within this loss
Thoughts of death inside, tear me apart from the core of my soul
Summer is miles and miles away, and no one would ask me to stay

And I, should contemplate this change, to ease the pain.
And I, should step out of the rain, turn away.

At times, the dark's fading slowly, but it never sustains.
Would someone watch over me, In my time of need.
Summer is miles and miles away, and no one would ask me to stay

And I, should contemplate this change, to ease the pain.
And I, should step out of the rain, turn away.
And I, should contemplate this change, to ease the pain.
And I, should step out of the rain, turn away."

It's like trying to fit that one puzzle piece in, you know it wont, but you keep trying to make it work...

I feel like you've put me on this pedestal...and I'm scared to death cause I'm not this person of perfection that you've made me out to be.  You're expectations are too high, out of reach. I'll never be who you claim I am. I'm..

Nothing.

You don't really get me, or my life. How could you? How could you understand? So we pretend it never happened, pretend everything is ok. But I don't wanna play make believe with you anymore. I feel like I'm walking on eggshells with you all the time, always afraid to speak, afraid to ask for your hand.....

Cause I'm drowning.

You've already told me once that my life was to blame for our first downfall. I was to blame. Because I got a little weak, because I was a little scared. And all I wanted was you, I needed you. You turned your back on me when things got a little rough. And now you think I've changed.

I haven't.

I'm just pretending. Isn't that the way you like it? Pretending everything is going to be ok when we really know it's just gonna blow up in our face later? But no, I'll play your game. I'll tell you my life is going good, great even. Tell you I'm happy and smile and laugh, just to make sure YOU'RE happy. To make sure I don't upset YOU again. God forbid if I say or do the wrong thing. I'm always watching my every step, to make sure I don't step on any toes.

This game is fun isn't it?

You're not me. Maybe if you were and you lived in my shoes for 10 minutes, you'd realize how strong I really am. Yeah I remember, remember that day you called me weak. I've made mistakes and so have you, that doesn't make me weak. I've come out pretty well for all the insanity I've been dealt. Before you point your fingers make sure your hands are clean. You just don't get it. Why can't it be enough that I love you and want to be there for you? That I want to make sure you're happy? When will I evet be what you need? Why is it that I'm always needing you, wanting you, loving you and it's never the other way around?

But I'll sit here and bite my tongue. Cause I'd rather be with you and have you use me as your puppet, break me down, kill what's left of me.

Then for me to not have you at all.